"Hindsight is always 20/20"
In future, try not to live in the same postcode as your neurotic landlord, let alone the same building.
Never rely on friends, especially if they’re called Joe and have had a few drinks.
If your Man and Van cancels on a Saturday not even sobbing on the phone can procure another one for Sunday.
To get cardboard boxes in London you have to go to a supermarket where they cheerily tell you to come back at 6am and collect them.
Car hire telephonists change their tone considerably when they discover you are not a businessman wanting to hire an E-class Mercedes and especially after you use the phrase “move my shit out.”
You will mutter to yourself approx 6 times under your breath “It would be friggin’ easier to move back to friggin’ New Zealand…”
Oliver is a wonderful human being and will come through, just in the nick of time, with plans C and D respectively.
You will be forced to throw out quite a lot of your books.
But not your “precious” back copies of the Face.