After 6 months, there was still not enough Drew in the world…
Have you ever had those moments when you were acting so cool in a big event and suddenly embarrass yourself? What happened?
I remember being on the Tube in the morning and realizing that I’d put my t-shirt on inside out. This t-shirt had a huge tag. It was screaming INSIDE OUT. I considered taking it off and turning it outside in but the action of getting topless in a busy carriage full of commuters was way too much. I got many sympathetic looks. People on the tube aren’t all bad you know.
Elizabeth, Michigan, USA
What is you favorite book? (or books, I like too many to pick just one)
Me too. You choose one and the others feel left out. I’m not very well read. I’m badly read. When I was fifteen I spent the whole year reading Agatha Christie. No, really I did. Miss Marple and I were like that.
I discovered the Tales of the City books when I arrived in London. Recently the Life of Pi, The Lovely Bones. Before that Catcher in the Rye, Generation X, Lolita, 1984, Faces in the Water, Birds, Beasts and Relatives. Roald Dahl for his sense of fun and Graham Greene for his observations.
What is the craziest thing you've ever done/seen on an airplane? Subquestion, are you a member of the mile high club?
I was upgraded to Business class. Does that count? It was from L.A. to Auckland – over twelve hours and they didn’t have a vegetarian meal so the onboard chef cooked me cous cous. That was pretty wild. Thinking back on it, sex would have been good too…
Biggest pet peeve?
People who say I don’t sound like I’m from New Zealand. I don’t – I sound English. A kiwi accent is all about the elongation of the vowels. I kept mine clipped. Having to go into a discussion about phonetics with nearly every person I meet is my major peeve. And the fact that phonetics isn’t spelt the way it sounds also pisses me off now I think about it.
If you do tequila shots, do you always do the salt and lime too?
Always - so I wake up the next morning with a rind and salt encrusted arm.
Sam, Sydney, Australia
Who was the best lover you ever had? (names can be changed to protect the innocent, but you’d better go into plenty of other details!)
Woo! Sam is an old friend. We go way back, hence the question. But I’m afraid the best lover I ever had was the first boy I ever fell in love with, Aaron (pronounced Ah – Rin, like an elf). We had youth, energy and because we were both students a WHOLE lotta time.
What causes a tornado?
A lot of hot air. Very similar to how blogs start.
Ted, California, USA
Who is the most famous person you have had a conversation with?
In Ibiza last year I become friends with Norma-Jean and Lucy from Chic. Now, they know what really went on in Studio 54.
If you could spend one year in perfect happiness but afterward would remember nothing of the experience would you do so? If not, why not?
Oh, good question. I remember a similar one about a pill that would make give you an orgasm for a year and after that time you’d die.
I wouldn’t do that - but I’d take the year of perfect happiness. I think the only catch would be if you DID remember it. Trying to build a life again after perfect happiness sounds like hell.
Lizzie, London, UK, Aged 27½.
If you could sever and reassemble body parts from various hunks, which limbs, pecs, abs, and pretty little face would make up your perfect man?
Matt Dillon’s scowl, George Clooney’s chin, Tom Cruise’s nose, Matt Damon’s ass, Hugh Jackman’s arms, John Travolta’s lips circa 1979. Everything else can be padded out with the usual suspects: Brad Pitt & Errol Flynn.
Ms. Chelly, Canada
What ever happened to Ronnie Barker?
There was a BAFTA tribute for Ronnie
on TV here a few months ago.
If you were a curry what sort of curry would you be?
Vegetarian Green Thai Curry with lots of mushrooms in.
Have you ever bent it like Beckham?
Ha ha ha. Too. Many. Puns! *Gets back on chair* I used to play football (soccer) when I was a kid. I had great ball control. Pfffft ha ha! Sorry.
What colour was your favorite pair of pants/trousers when you were a kid?
I don’t have one. Somehow that makes me sad – liked I missed out.
Would you prefer to make a name for yourself in playwriting, short stories, essays, novels, etc?
I think a playwright and a novelist equally. Oh God, wouldn’t that be lovely.
If you were going to write a ransom note, and you really wanted it to sing and stand out from the usual run-of-the-mill ransom note, what would it say?
Singing telegram ransom notes. Gorilla Costumes. Tap-Dancing.
Is there any kind of physical activity or sport that you have yet to try? What is stopping you?
I’ve never rock climbed before. What’s stopping me? Fear of rock climbing.
What song would you have Kylie and Dannii cover if they were finally to record together?
A very dirty electroclash cover of “Sisters Are Doin’ It For Themselves”.
Do you like your partners to do anything with your nose sexually?
Ha ha ha. Jef, I’m blushing. Licking, nibbling, kissing. And depending on who it is, their other suggestions are not to be sniffed at.
When you meet someone for the first time, what do you usually notice first and what does this tell you about the person?
I always notice if someone is kind. An easy attribute to spot, but it’s often overlooked. Kindness is an underrated virtue altogether in my humble opinion.
Liv, Melbourne, Australia
If you were a cup of coffee, what sort of coffee would you be? (long black, skinny cap, soy latte?)
A Macchiato because I love saying it. Macchiato. Macchiato. Macchiato.
Best ever first date?
With the second person ever fell in love with. He’s Swiss and was in London to celebrate his 29th birthday. We were both in a horrid, smelly after hours club and I spotted him, built up my courage and asked for a light (even though, I in fact had one in my pocket. Smooth). I used the line “Come back to mine and we can get up tomorrow to do some sight seeing”. Let’s just say that we didn’t make it to Buckingham Palace.
Why hasn't some TV producer contracted you yet to star in a sitcom/drama called something like "Drew in the City" - along the lines of SaTC?
You win the prize! Get this lady a medal!
If you were a girl what sort of slut would you be?
A big one. But I’d be classy with it like Belle de Jour.
Have you ever felt like u need to vomit ur life in a positive way (or not)?
Hell yeah! That’s why I started writing. The whole process is a big purge.
Ok since you are a fabulously gay man, I wonder have you ever had sex with a woman?
I never have, Kate. I knew from an early age that I was gay and being a sometimes unnervingly pragmatic young lad I had no desire to experiment with the fairer sex. Women are amazing. But only men turn me on.
And one more to oblige you...
Fill in the blank: If I had a dollar for every time I used a thesaurus
, I'd be a RICH man.
What is your most embarrassing moment?
Oh – I’ve remembered another one! When I was 8 and I was at swimming training and my Mother came to watch and started breastfeeding my youngest sister Ellie on the bleachers. She got her boob out and everything! She’s going to kill me for writing about that.
Daisy, London, UK
What ever happened to Dean Friedman?
I had to find out who he was but now I have I can report – he’s still going! He just finished some gigs in the UK. Go Dean!
If you were a floor covering what sort of floor covering would you be? (I struggled with this one for a while, thinking it said "if you were alan (thing)". I'd finally settled on one involving Alan Delon when I found my glasses. Ahem.)
A terracotta mosaic.
Have you ever eaten jelly babies while naked?
I’ve only just discovered how delicious jelly babies are here in the UK. Soft, covered in icing sugar… Can I get back to you on that one?
Several years ago, some friends/coworkers and I were sitting around talking about ideal boyfriends/girlfriends and the characteristics they would have. Out of this conversation came the following question I’ll ask you: if you could distill all the characteristics of your ideal boyfriend to 3 things – or attributes – what would they be?
Wit, charm, grit. (And being able to put up with my snoring).
With the exception of the occasional oyster sauce, what is the reason you are a vegetarian?
My Mother is so she brought us up vegetarian too. People ask me now why I don’t try eating meat but why change the habit of a lifetime? I know it tastes good (apparently) but where I’m standing it kinda smells like blood and death. Mmmmm… finger lickin’ good!
From your blog I know you like to travel – what is your favorite place you’ve been? Conversely, what is the next place you’d most like to visit & why?
I want to go to New York SO MUCH. I’ve also always wanted to travel to Tokyo. The favourite place I’ve been? San Francisco was brilliant. I love Thailand too.
Jennifer, Missouri, USA
What do you envision your life to be like in ten years if things are going the way you want them to (career, family, etc.)?
Having a house in New Zealand and one in London. One book published and a play in production. To be a fun Uncle, a Godfather to numerous Scooby children and perhaps start thinking about adopting a kid of my own. Spending more time with my Mum and sisters Ellie, Holly and Amber. Drinking Guinness regularly with my Dad.
Thanks to Susan for so patiently taking the photos, my Mother for buying me the lovely red top and my sis Hol for making sure it was lovely. Love to Am and Ellie, Ryan and Harri too. Thanks again to everyone who sent me a question and to anyone who spends their precious time reading this blog.