If I don't laugh, I'll cry. A lot.
At lunchtime I had nearly finished a whole chapter. It had taken two and a half days but I felt I was on the money. Saving the document regularly I was completing the final paragraph
when I thought "hmm, I'll back this up in a second" and hit the save button. Everything went screwy. SCREWY. Boxes popped up asking me if I wanted to rescue the document. FROM WHAT? FROM WHAAAAAAAAAAAT??? Word closed and I felt a terrible wave of sickness sweep over me. With as much calm as I could muster, I opened Word again and the document. It came up but instead of my pretty little words, ordered in lines and sentences and such, there were BOXES. AND QUESTION MARKS. THE OCCASSIONAL ‘J’. I tried not to panic. Perhaps it had been rescued and saved somewhere else? I searched. I found. A plain text file with the SAME BOXES AND QUESTION MARKS AND WEIRDNESS. Finally, I did the ol' faithful and rebooted the computer. As it loaded I literally BEGGED my chapter to reappear. I PLEADED. I PRAYED. My exact words were "Please, please, please, please, please, please, pleeeeeease" with an emphasis on the fourth and last ‘pleases’. Nothing. Then I went mad for a second. Absolutely fucking mad. I banged the bed with both hands. I threw pillows. I pulled my hair. I ran into the other rooms (I was home alone) but nothing could change the fact that my chapter, and almost three days of work was GONE. I have had two computer type people’s opinions now, and they both agree that it is GONE.
I went for a swim. And while I was swimming I remembered reading Before Night Falls
and how each time the writer Reinaldo Arenas' books were discovered by the Cuban Government, they would destroy them and he would have to start them from scratch. And that happened a lot. Like a lot
lot. And he was thrown into jail and persecuted because of his sexuality, and then finally when he escaped to the US he died of AIDS. So after I got back from my swim, I started writing down the chapter again while it was fresh in my mind. ON PAPER. BEAUTIFUL UNCRASHIBLE NOT-MADE-BY-THE -BASTARD-MICROSOFT-COMPANY PAPER. I'm tired and it mostly looks like this - "And then this guy says something to this other guy" and - "keyword = fizzles" whatever the hell that means, but I'm sure in the morning I'll feel better about everything. And I'm gonna get the 'puter looked at. And back up regularly. And double back up. And send you the rushes each day to put in a safe. And I'm sure that bald patch won't take too long to grow out.