Let’s open a can o’ bullet points for the nice kids in London. And for everyone else around the World. Bullet points for all! *throws bullet points to crowd*
• Last night was Guy Fawkes
in New Zealand. Yes, exactly the same as the festival in Britain. Except that it’s Spring here. So the kids have to stay up until 11pm to write their names with a sparkler. As a child I’d be delirious with tiredness before we’d even started the fireworks and then the Catherine Wheels would never spin properly.
• I have an Agent!
• And the Benefit!
• I had to choose between two agents. They both told me the same information:
1. That there’s not much acting work in New Zealand (which is why I went to London in the first place).
2. That I was getting to a good age range because “after 25 most people start giving up”.
3. Most of the work is in Auckland.
4. But they think I’ll get work. Neither of them added “as an walk-on extra”. They did express concern that I might not be able to do a kiwi accent, though. To which I said “Struth mate, don’t spit the dummy, my accent barks like a dog” whatever that means. They seemed to understand.
• My new Agent, who from this point on will be known as ‘The Agent’ or sometimes ‘the Agentmeister’, is a good kiwi guy. He’s also tight with the professional Theatresports Company here in the Capital so it looks like I’ll be auditioning for them. Better put my improvisation pants on! *Walks to wardrobe*
• Because I have my Benefit I have a little bit of money now, which means I’m going to buy me some porn! And some rent boys! And some rent boy porn!
What? It’s lonely writing a book, alright?
• I’ve just thought of something. Seth (from the O.C.) is basically Xander (from Buffy) - but with better hair. Discuss.